Our Honor Defend

To be honest, outside of a few Big Ten matchups, I have no idea what else will be on the moving pictures box this week.  I guess it would be a good time to find out.

Tuesday

• Ball State @ Miami (OH) (ESPN2, 7:00PM ET).  I’m usually pretty good at catching the midweek MAC games, but I decided that Tuesday night is Books and Coffee night for me.  Instead, of watching this game, I was at a local cafe with a book… and some coffee.  Judging from the 3 seconds of highlights I watched on Sportscenter later, I don’t think I missed much as Ball State took home a somewhat unimpressive conference road win.  Besides, it’s really hard to get excited about a Tuesday night matchup between two red birds in the MAC.

Wednesday

• Central Michigan @ Northern Illinois (ESPN2, 8:00PM ET).  Oh boy, another midweek MAC matchup.  I don’t know what else to say about this other than it’s another MAC matchup… and that I probably won’t watch much of it on account of a previous engagement.

Thursday

• Virginia Tech @ Miami (FL) (ESPN, 7:30PM ET).  It’s not quite another midweek MAC game, but it’s close.  With the recent talk of an Orange Bowl at-large bid for the Buckeyes, watching more of the ACC might be in my interest.  Presently, Virginia Tech and Miami (FL) are 2nd and 3rd in the What’s-it division (behind North Carolina), while Wake Forest and Florida State are tied upon the Whatchamacallit Division.   If it comes to a Buckeye-ACC game in the Orange Bowl this year and we win by anything less than 30 points, then heads must roll.

Friday

• Cincinnati @ Louisville (ESPN2, 8:00PM ET).  After winning at West Virginia in overtime, the Bearcats have the inroad to… sigh… a BCS game.  All they have left is Louisville, who sucks, and Syracuse, who sucks, to go with Pittsburgh.  Pitt, also 3-1 in conference, will travel to Cincinnati for what will be the de facto conference championship game for the Big East.  Someone please hire Brian Kelly away from them.  Whatever big program does hire him gets a proven winner while I get the satisfaction of knowing that Cincinnati can stop this nonsense of trying to compete with the Buckeyes.

Saturday

• Indiana @ Penn State (BTN, 12:00PM ET).  If Indiana HS wants to be superduper cool and beat Penn State, who will then beat Michigan State, thus paving the way for us to have an outright conference title, that would be neat.  *Fingers crossed*.
• Ohio State @ Illinois (ESPN, 12:00PM ET).  It doesn’t seem like anything will have changed from week 11 to week 12.  Last week, the Buckeyes traveled to Illinois to play a spread-ish up-and-comer led by a mobile QB in a game called by Andre Ware and Dave Pasch.  This week, the Buckeyes travel to Illinois to play a spread-ish up-and-comer led by a mobile QB in a game called by Andre Ware and Dave Pasch.  After Illinois’ inexplicable loss to Western Michigan in Detroit last week — inexplicable both by the virtue of them losing and that they would even play Western Michigan… in Michigan… this late into the season — the Illini are staring bowl ineligibility right in the eyes.  I won’t be happy unless this game ends in a total decimation of the Illini.  They can keep the fucking turtle, I just want some violence… especially out of our offensive line… but NOT AFTER THE WHISTLE ALEX BOONE.
• Northwestern @ Michigan (ESPN2, 12:00PM ET).  My eyes will be naturally glued to the TV for the Buckeye game, but I’ll be pulling hard for Northwestern to win this game.  I don’t know how much wind the Minnesota game put in Michigan’s sails, but I want that out and I want them demoralized for The Game next week.  It’s basically their bowl game, so I’m expecting their best effort.
• Notre Dame @ Navy (The SEC Network, 12:00PM ET).  Navy’s gonna start a streak of their own.
• Georgia @ Auburn (ESPN360.com, 12:30PM ET).  The Ohio State Buckeyes of the South travel to Auburn to face the hapless Tigers.  Auburn is 5-5 and has two games left: Georgia and Alabama.  The latter is on the road in Tuscaloosa.  They won’t be favored in any of those games. *Snicker*.
• South Carolina @ Florida (CBS, 3:30PM ET).  I’ll always think of Steve Spurrier as a clown, but I’ll be all aboard the Cocks-wagon for this game.  Florida already has the SEC East wrapped up and will be finishing conference play this week, before finishing the regular season against Florida State in a rivalry game that used to be interesting… almost.
• North Carolina @ Maryland (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  This game is on ABC?
• California @ Oregon State (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  Another curious selection for ABC/ESPN.  Again: if Oregon State wins out, they go to the Rose Bowl and not USC.  Basically, at this stage, USC is more likely to play for a national title than they are to play in the Rose Bowl.
• Minnesota @ Wisconsin (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  ABC didn’t exactly cobble together a trifecta of excitement at the 3:30 timeslot.  Minnesota goes on the road after a demoralizing loss to Michigan the week earlier while Wisconsin plays host to Minnesota after a demoralizing whole season.
• USC @ Stanford (Versus, 7:00PM ET).  Stanford and USC meet for the first time since, well… you remember.  In spite of Harbaugh’s dicketry against the Buckeyes in 1986, he has my well wishes in this game.
• Mississippi State @ Alabama (ESPN, 7:45PM ET).  Mississippi State sucks and the world is finally starting to see how much of a knucklehead John Parker Wilson really is.  So why is this a night game?  On John Parker Wilson, I’ll never understand why it’s so common in the southeastern part of the United States for the white dudes to go by the shortened first name-middle name-last name combination.  John Parker Wilson or John David Booty, you never say it John, or John Parker/David, but always the full damn name when in conversation with them.  Todd Blackledge will be calling this game, so I’m inclined to see what Taste of the Town he does for Tuscaloosa this time around.  He’s been here and done it here before, but hasn’t chosen Dreamland BBQ in spite of all the commercials they air down here.  It’s just as well, because Dreamland sucks.
• Oklahoma State @ Colorado (ABC, 8:00PM ET).  Oklahoma State was rocked last week by Texas Tech, but I have confidence in Mike Gundy.  He’s a man and he can take it.  Curiously enough, this is a matchup between two of the better coaching tirades in all of college football.  I’m more partial to Gundy’s tirade than I am to Hawkins’ tirade, but you can always debate which one was better.  Lest we forget: Gundy basically yelled at a woman (the author of the article in question), by proxy, and wished that whatever child she’d have in the future — which Gundy suggests she doesn’t have now, obviously, because of the article she wrote — would be denigrated without mercy so she could have her just come-uppins.
• Vanderbilt @ Kentucky (ESPN2, 8:00PM ET).  Kentucky is 6-4 and Vanderbilt is 5-4 and losers of 4 straight.  Naturally, the WWL thinks this is worthy of a night game.