Our Honor Defend

Another week, another eclectic array of college football options.  This time, the Buckeyes return from their week long suspension to resume normal football operations.  But what else is on?

Tuesday

• Miami (OH) @ Buffalo (ESPN2, 7:30PM ET).  I thought about retitling this post as What to Watch for -- Week ElevOHMYGODICAN’THIDEFROMTHISSTUPIDELECTIONEVENBYWATCHINGESPN.  No matter how hard I try, there’s no escape from the irritance of the modern US election.  I thought for sure I could hide by watching some good ol’ fashioned Tuesday night MAC football, but noooooope.  Couldn’t do that, as the ESPN’s news crawl had to keep updating me on the election.  As it was, I watched about 10 minutes of this game before going to my computer, putting on the headphones to jam out to some John Cale and read a book I’ve been plowing through.  Even then, the Facebook messages and instant messages made sure to remind me that there was no escape.  The messages were pretty diverse binary, ranging from “OMG I’M MOVING TO EUROPE WHICH IS A REASONABLE REACTION CONSIDERING MY HATRED OF OBAMA’S POLITICS MAKES ME A CERTAIN FIT IN WESTERN EUROPE” to “OMGHOPECHANGELOLWTFOMGOBAMA”.  On the matter at hand, Miami (OH) lost this game 37-17, which doesn’t seem right considering that there’s a Parseghian and a Shula on Miami’s roster.  Oh, and why were both Miami (OH) and Buffalo wearing their respective home reds and blues?  Please tell me that had nothing to do with the election…

Wednesday

• Northern Illinois @ Ball State (ESPN2, 8:00PM ET). I’m sorry, but BCS contenders don’t play on Wednesday.  Next question…

Thursday

• Maryland @ Virginia Tech (ESPN, 7:30PM ET). Awwww, the ACC is playing on Thursday night.  Awww.  It’s just like the pee-wee games.  I hope the family of the teammates remember to bring the Capri Sun, animal crackers and orange slices to the boys after the game.  Presently, Maryland is in control of its own destiny in the What’s-it-Called Division in the ACC, and Virginia Tech is first to last in the Whatchamacallit Division.  ACC Football: It’s Football… We Think ®.
• TCU @ Utah (CBS College Sports… Don’t Worry, You Don’t Have It So Don’t Try Looking, 8:00PM ET).  The no. 12 team in the country is playing visitor to the no. 8 team in the country… and I can’t watch.  That does NOT ROCK.

Friday

• Nevada @ Fresno State (ESPN2, 9:00PM ET). It’s WAC Football, which Wikipedia tells me actually is Division 1-A football.  You learn something new everyday.  As it is, the primogenitors of the Buckeye Pistol go on the road to Fresno, to play a team that’s basically the college football equivalent of the hot girl in high school that went to college, put on the Freshman Forty and now says and does thing that would make Red Foxx vomit and speaks in a tone that would make Geoffrey Holder sound squeaky.

Saturday

• Ohio State @ Northwestern (ESPN2, 12:00PM ET).  Seeee, this is what you get for being the least interesting 2 loss team in America.  You get the noontime kickoff on ESPN2.  The Buckeyes finally resume normal football operations after their week-long suspension for a poor run of play against the Nittany Lions.  Lake the Posts is your one stop-shop for Northwestern insight, and may be where you want to peruse for information before I put up the Open Thread thoughts on Friday.  Of course, I don’t know why you would come here for football insight, but alas.  If you’re one of those people that loathe Pam Ward (I’m not, and I appear to be one of a few people in that camp), be grateful that Michigan is as awful as they are this season and that Northwestern beat Minnesota last week in Minneapolis.  It might have been the difference of Pam Ward going to commentate that game as opposed to this one.
• Michigan @ Minnesota (ESPN, 12:00PM ET).  It really doesn’t make a difference since, odds are, if you have ESPN you probably have ESPN2 as well.  That said, it’s still curious, if only as a symbolic gesture, why this game for the jug thingie is on ESPN and the better game (Ohio State @ Northwestern) gets punted over to ESPN2.  Not that it matters, you won’t be watching this game anyways as Minnesota tries to get the jug back for the first time since 2005.
• Wisconsin @ Indiana (BTN, 12:00PM ET).  Two high school teams battle for last place in the Big Ten.  Poor Wisconsin.  Picked to finish second (or thereabouts) in the Big Ten preseason, now they don’t even have the tiebreaker against Michigan.  But again, you won’t be watching.  Moving on…
• Wyoming @ Tennessee (ESPN360.com, 1:00PM ET).  Tennessee plays its first game since Fulmer announced that he won’t be returning.  You know what the fun part about this game is? For a homecoming game involving a traditional SEC power (if a junior power), this is now an evenly matched game.
• Tennessee-Martin @ Auburn (???, 2:30PM ET).  See above… except (what I think will be) Tuberville’s eventual departure from Auburn hasn’t been made public yet.
• Alabama @ LSU (The SEC Network, 3:30PM ET).  Nick Saban makes his first trip back to LSU as Alabama’s head coach.  But don’t bring that up, else Bear Saban will go apeshit on your ass.  I obviously don’t know for sure, but I have a hunch we’ll be getting LSU in the Capital One Bowl¹.. so I’m inclined to watch.
• Penn State @ Iowa (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  I’ve resigned myself to the fact that we’re not getting the Big Ten trophy this year.  Although, if Iowa wants to beat Penn State for us… and if Michigan State wants to accrue another loss, but beat Penn State at the end of the year, that’d be cool.  It’s not gonna happen, but it would be cool.
• Oklahoma @ Texas A&M (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  Remember 10 years ago? When Texas A&M was the bad-ass destroyer of worlds on defense and Oklahoma was some dusty outpost in the landscape of college football?  Texas A&M won the matchup that year 29-0.  Oklahoma finished 5-6.  Texas A&M won the Big 12 title, but was torn to shreds in the first half by us in the Sugar Bowl².  My how the time flies.  Suffice to say, that 29-0 A&M victory probably won’t be the case this Saturday.
• Clemson @ Florida State (ABC, 3:30PM ET).  The 2008 installment of the Bowden… Bowl… ooooooooh, sorry.
• Oregon State @ UCLA (I think one of the two Fox Sports LAs will pick this up, 6:00PM ET).  Believe it or not, but if Oregon State wins out, they go to the Rose Bowl and not USC.  They’ll get a taste of things in the Rose Bowl against the home team Bruins on Saturday.
• Colorado State @ Air Force (The MTN, 6:00PM ET).  It’s a service academy football game.  Ergo, you must watch… communist.
• Oklahoma State @ Texas Tech (ABC, 8:00PM ET).  Texas Tech hosts the Cowboys just a week after its stirring victory over the Longhorns.  Mike Gundy ain’t a-scurred, though.  He’s a man.  He’s 40.  He can take it.³
• Florida @ Vanderbilt (ESPN2, 8:00PM ET).  Remember like a month ago? When Vanderbilt was a hot commodity in college football because they were the nerd school of the SEC and everyone was stroking on about how they were undefeated and were going to make a January bowl game and had the SEC East in the palm of their hands? Hell, even we thought it was Change We Could Believe In.  Well, that hot commodity has lost 3 straight, including a home game to last place in the ACC --yes: that ACC — Duke — yes: that Duke.  They may end up going Bowling for the first time in 20-some odd years, but it won’t be in January.  Beating Florida would be kind of cool, though.
• California @ USC (ABC, 8:00PM ET).  Cal last beat USC in 2003.  They probably won’t do it this year.
• Notre Dame @ Boston College (ESPN, 8:00PM ET).  Why is this game primetime on ESPN?  At least this “rivalry” gave us this epic YouTube.

1. On second thought, I think the Cotton Bowl gets the second option (that is: not BCS) SEC team if it’s in the SEC West.  I’m not sure on the details [↩]
2. Remind me to put up a Drive-Thru compilation of that game before too long [↩]
3. Editor’s Note: I’ll stop making references to that epic tirade from last year the exact moment it is no longer funny… which will be never. [↩]